starlightfaraway | ic ❧ open post.

The beauty of the world seemed to have faded away. She had once been excited and impatient to see the world beyond the borders of Mirkwood. The starlight was as far as she could reach, and in the few dreams of her life, Tauriel had walked among them. Reality always seemed to find her. Now it seemed as if she were living a waking nightmare that was impossible to wake from. Her mistake had tainted her. She could feel the blood on her hands and on her heart. It felt suffocating and it crawled over her skin. How was she truly better than the orcs and spiders of evil that she had slaughtered in the name of protecting her King?

His soft voice was what stirred her from her inner thoughts. Her eyes darted up, suddenly alert and she kicked away from him. Her hands reached for her bow and arrow. In a quick movement they were pointed at the mysterious elf. The hands that were once steady shook slightly, knowing that not just a weapon lay in her hands. Tauriel knew she could not kill him. But, she had to defend herself.

"One step closer and it will be your last." Tauriel bluffed.

Edited 2015-01-20 04:59 (UTC)

He looks up at her and does not move, quiet and calm as a deep lake (dangerous, her instincts would tell her, but he keeps his hands where she can see them and does not move except to look at her with dark grey eyes).

"I do not think so, forest child. Those hands of yours have seen enough already hm? Put down your bow."

His voice is calm and gentle, and music sings underneath it.

Her lip quivers at the sound of his voice. He speaks in such a melodic tone that she feels unworthy to hear. Tauriel closes her eyes and lowers the bow. Who is he to show her such kindness after what she has done? A part of her heart lifts at the idea that perhaps someone would not be so disgusted by what she has done. Mercy and companionship are far too much for her to ask for of the world, but it is what she wants nonetheless.

"You should not waste your time on me." She says softly. "I doubt your kin would see highly of you afterwards."

"There now." Gently he takes it from her hands.

"Ah forest child. Can you not guess who I am? I have no kin left to care, and I am myself long forsaken."

Tauriel's eyebrows lift. She could guess at the tales she heard as a child of the First Age and the horrors that came from it. Yet, she is afraid to. Something about who he is makes her fearful of knowing who she is.

"No. I cannot." Tauriel says--although the words sound more like I will not.

"Can you not?" He murmurs softly, sitting back on his heels and watching her with Treelight in his eyes, the star-of-feanor glinting coldly on his breast.

"Well. Shall I tell you a story then?" His voice drops to the lilt of the story teller, and his eyes never leave hers. "Once, there were seven brothers, who for love of their father swore an oath most terrible. Abandoning everything they loved saving only each other, they left their home and went to war. One by one, they fell to madness and despair, and in the end only one was left. He passed out of song and tale and no one knows where he went, or what became of him."

Her face softens as her expression becomes one of awe. It is a story that all children know. The sons and brothers of Fëanor who sought the gems of starlight. What happened to them has never been fully known, as his story says. Tauriel may be young but she is not naive. The meaning behind his words is not lost on her.

"Except you know." Tauriel shifts enough to face him fully. "What became of him when he fell so far from the rest of his kin?"

The question holds many meanings. She wants to know what has happened to him, as it is obvious now who he is. She wants to know what will become of her after her own deeds.

"He wandered." Maglor says softly. "He kept himself away from all good folk lest his curse follow him. He went mad, they say, but he could never escape himself. So... one day he decided... that he would, at least, make sure no one ever forgot. So he started singing again - his grief, his regret, his loneliness, his pain. He sang them to the wind and the waves, and the fishermen heard him and carried his songs inland, and he knew that no one would ever forget. He wandered, and he came inland, seeking the family that he had left. He watched them and he sang for them, also, and did what he could to keep them safe from a distance. He knew... there was no forgiveness. But perhaps... he could keep them safe. And it would be enough, to know that somewhere, there were those who could still smile."

Her gaze remains soft as he continues. A protector from afar. Can she perhaps due the same? Can she fight evil and try to atone for what she has done? Perhaps there will be no forgiveness. It is a sin, a tarnish on her soul that will mark her forever.

Tauriel exhales slowly, letting her shoulders sink and her guard lower. He is no threat. If he meant her harm then that would have been done before his tale even began.

"I do not suppose this wanderer would again like the company of another." She speaks with such assurance and presence in her voice, but underneath is the understanding of rejection. His songs and tales had kept him company for so many years. Why tarnish what is left of him with another who bears the same sin?

He smiles for her then, the sun peeking out from behind the clouds, and he reaches with a hand (so very scarred) to brush a strand of hair from her face.

"I would never refuse my granddaughter."

His hand feels so gentle against her skin. Thranduil had always been so kind to her. She had repaid it with such betrayal. How does she deserve such kindness? Especially from her own family?

Still, a smile touches her face despite the tears in her eyes. "I would offer my bow in service... if it had not been disgraced."

"It has not" He says firmly. "I heard the tales. I listened to the stories. You struck in fear - an accident, a slip - not in anger or for an Oath too terrible to be foresworn."

Gently, he wipes the tears from her cheeks an presses a kiss to her brow.

"But if my grieving granddaughter thinks that to wander with her broken grandfather would ease her pain, then he would welcome her, with open arms."

Tauriel's gaze falls as he spoke. "The reasoning does not change how the outcome is seen, Grandfather." The word is so odd to say, but it also feels so natural to say.

She raises a hand to her face to brush the other tears from her face as he kisses her brow. "I have nowhere else to go."

"Maybe not" He agrees. "But those who love you know the difference. And you grieve him, hm? Who was as a father to you. Such an error is a terrible blow, but no stain, I think, lies on you."

He tugs her to her feet. "Not quite - you could Sail, you know. I am sure your parents would wish to see you again. And if you want to beg forgiveness of Thranduil, it is the only place you will be able to do so. The Elvenking would grieve if you do so without telling him, I am sure, but you need not Sail now. That door will always be open to you."

Her head tilts to the side as she listens to him speak. Even if he is true in what he says? Tauriel feels as if there is a stain on her soul. Perhaps it is because of her grief, or the apparent family history now at her feet, but whatever the reason? She feels heavier than she ever has.

Tauriel raises to her feet gracefully as any other elf. She tilts her head back and squares her shoulders to look at the elder elf evenly. "They would let me sail despite the Elvenking that is dead because of me?"

She thought that it was a chance that was taken from her the moment her arrow sang through the air.

"They would let you Sail." Maglor says gently, "Because you acted out of fear, through the impulse trained in you by long years of war, unknowing, and without malice. Thranduil himself would likely say the same."

He shrugs a little. "The exile was laid on me, and not you. I see no reason why the way would be barred. Besides. You are wounded sore, granddaughter, and where else does healing lie by in Aman the Blessed?"

Doubt settles into her heart about what Thranduil would say. Her king had been so against war and standing with the Men of Laketown and the Dwarves of Erebor. How could he understand that what she had done was not of malice? She defied him, broke her oaths, and ran out to her own. There was little reason for Thranduil to believe in anything when it came to her now.

"Some would say that time heals wounds." Tauriel replies with her eyebrows perked. "Or, that traveling and learning of a world much larger than yourself could provide the understanding to healing wounds."

Not that she truly has any knowledge of that either way.

"Time, it is true, heals many things" Maglor shrugs a little. "But there are things that go so deep that there is no healing them, not with time or all the beauties of this world. And this world is still very beautiful, granddaughter. And though in all lands, love is now mingled with pain, it does not grow any less so, I think."

He smiles at her. "I will let my granddaughter decide - if you Sail or if you stay, I will come as far with you as I can."

ic ❧ open post.

no no TLDR all you want! I'm just so slow :(

/nuzz I am just as slow

We shall be slow sad elves together :c

indeed

/continues the trend, but still here!

/snail tagging go!

/well i was better for a bit

/pats gently

school needs to stop draining me so much. I want to tag!

/makes you plenty of tea

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